You'll Understand When You Have Kids of Your Own

Everyone talks about how life-altering having a child is, but it's really hard to articulate how it feels.  I remember asking my girlfriends, "How does it feel to be a mom?"  Now, being on the receiving end of that question, I've thought a LOT about it.  How do I describe to someone what being a parent feels like?

It's not perfect.  But here's the closest I've got (and sorry, it's mushy.  But seriously, you asked what it feels like to be a parent.  What did you expect?):

Imagine a heart that's shared between two people.  I don't mean that one person has one half and the other person has the second half.  I mean that it's one single heart that beats in the ribs of two people.  That's what it felt like for me being in love with my husband.  It was like our hearts were always one heart, and without each other  in our lives we just felt...wrong...or off somehow.  Once we found each other, the closer we were the easier it was: as if our heart had to work harder to keep us strong when we were far apart.  But still, finding each other made us feel complete.  Happy.  Even from a distance.  

Now imagine that same heart.  But instead of being protected by your ribs AND the ribs of your partner, it is passed through your body and living outside of you in your child.  Suddenly you see this love radiating in every corner of your world.  When it was inside you, you could never see how strong, how beautiful it was.   But, with the splendor comes terror too.  Every day is agony.  It doesn't matter where you are, how close your baby is.  Your heart will never be inside you again.  It goes with that baby wherever he goes, and nothing will keep it safe forever.